And he asked: Why are you single?

I frequent a local restaurant that my friend owns and tonight I went by to visit her and her grumpy, obnoxious friend who I have come to know. In all reality, he is a real hoot and the things that come out of his mouth sometimes tend to be sarcastic or can be taken as rude. But he is a character, that fella and I laugh when I am around him.

Now back to my story, as I spoke to "Andy" (the obnoxious one), he asked me "Why don't you have a boyfriend? Why are you single?" I laughed, and smiled at him and responded "I am too busy for that." He looked at me and responded, "So what! You can stiill have a sex life." I just stared at him, I think my mouth dropped at that moment. I laughed and responded; "A sex life? What's that? No thanks." He continued to ask me about it and why I didn't want a hook up buddy. I couldn't stop laughing. And then he asked me "How are you so busy?" I then told him about all the projects I was working on - The first book; the sequel; making, selling and promoting my jewelry; working on my cancer non-profit; and my cancer for profit. He looked dumbfounded really, and continued to tell me that I needed a sex life. Lol. As I stood there and told my friend about Andy's craziness, she giggled when he pointed to a drunk mam at the end of the bar and told me that he liked me, he wanted to go out with me. It was funny really, there Andy was teasing me away, getting a kick out of my responses. I just continued to laugh at what he was saying. And i think the last thing I said to him was this - "I don't need a man to be happy. I don't mind being single, and I have more important things to do right now."

The truth is that when I was younger, before cancer I didn't care who I dated, I just dated people. I was always in a rush to be with someone, as if I had to have a man to survive. But after cancer, I feel differently about things. When I am looking eventually, I want a man who is driven, passionate and intelligent. There are more qualities that I look for, definitely. So, now I ask you, why are you single? If you are of course single, you still can be fabulous!

Remembering The Good Ol' Days - Way Before Cancer!

So, today, I started to remember things, some great memories I had and treasured from my time way before cancer. Remembering the wonderful times in our lives, are great in aiding us through the toughest times. I mention often that life is too short and that we need to embrace and enjoy the simple things in life, the things that make us truly happy. I'm going to tell you about some of my favorite, most precious memories that I have of growing up, and I will start at the beginning......

* As a young child, I was very creative and artistic, and could entertain myself for hours. Although I don't recall this, my mom reminisces about it often. When I was little - maybe 2 years old or so, I would wake up in the morning and play with my toys for an hour or more, instead of waking up my mom. During bath time, I would play with my bath toys - and have them talking to one another. Cute! I remember living in New York City (good ol' Manhattan) with my mom & dad and the great memories I had while living in these huge apartments called "Waterside Plaza". Waterside Plaza was amazing, it was a huge brown building, and maybe half way up, there was an outdoor playground, an elevated pool and a little liquor store of sorts on a large balcony area. I remember having a great time in that playground and can remember it as if it were yesterday. I recall the great times I had with a best friend, whose mother used to cook us up a large pot of spaghetti, chicken and mix in some ketchup. As bizarre of a combination that it sounds like, I loved it, and still like a little pasta, chicken and ketchup every so often. Mom tells me about the days that I would make creatures out of clay (like I do now) - like a little bunny rabbit, holding a basket with eggs in it. Wow! Impressive for a little girl huh? She says the detail was amazing!

* I remember living in Elmhurst, New York, which was right near Flushing. I think we lived on 80th Street and Grand Avenue? I went to an elementary school that was within walking distance of my home - PS 102 Queens. I lived on the third floor of an apartment building, with some enormous gas tank behind our home. I had some great friends that I hung out with often, Lilly & Lisa and I were almost inseparable and you could always find us playing at the end of the street by this old cherry tree. We'd play for hours, climbing on the cherry tree, eating cherries and pretending we were exploring. I remember walking with my friends down the street to meet with my other friend Patricia, and all of us girls enjoying a nice big slice of New York pizza at a local place. Sleepovers at Lisa's house were the best. I recall my fun days with Lisa, Lilly and Silvia, when we went to the movies together, rode the bus and enjoyed burgers at White Castle. Silvia, was a friend that I met at school, she was from Argentina, her dad was a dentist, and she was so much fun to be with. I remember the times that my stepdad and I would go more into the city part of our town, which was really only a few blocks away from my house and we would get icees. The BEST ever icee in the world was chocolate chip. I always looked forward to those days out. One of my best memories of Patricia, was when my family, Patricia and I went out of town - I believe to the Poconos to celebrate New Years. My step dad was a comedian at the time and had a comedy gig at the hotel that we were staying at. Patricia and I stayed up so late that night, until my parents came into our room and invited us to the party they were having in the hotel restaurant. Patricia and I danced and ate, till our tummies were beyond full. What a great night!!

* For years, I used to go in the car and my parents would say: "Take a nap." I would reply with "I'm not tired! I'm not tired!" and seconds later, I would pass out fast asleep. But one time was different, I saw the traffic and decided to take a nap, but before I did I said to my family - "It's going to be a long trip for you and a very short trip for me."

* My mom used to love taking me to my Uncle Kenny's in New Jersey by bus, and I guess one day I was so mad at her, only five years old, I packed my bag and announced "I'm leaving for Uncle Kenny's!" at the front door.

* I remember the road trips that my family and I took, while my step dad was doing his comedy gigs. One of my most memorable trips was..... when we went to this amazing hotel, that had an indoor pool and playground that I could see from my room (which I was lucky enough to have my own room at the time). There was a mall attached to the hotel, and as you entered the hotel, there was a huge waterfall in the center of the lobby, that went into a pool. It was one of the most exotic hotels that I ever recall going to. I think it was a Holiday Inn in Visalia. There were plenty of comedy shows that my step dad did across the country, and we drove to all of them. I recall one where a gentleman in the back of the room was laughing so hard, that he fell out of his bar seat. The creative and artistic young girl that I was, I drew a picture for the hotel that showed the man falling out of his chair. I believe the comedy club was called Bananas, and on the picture I wrote - At Bananas, you'll laugh till you drop! Or something to that extent - I was ten at the time.

* I remember my tap dancing lessons, that my grandma used to take me to, and our trips to Carvel ice cream afterwards. I loved the times I visited my grandma in Long Island and explored her house, and played in the backyard - climbing on the trees, running around and hanging with her really nice neighbor Mac and his wife. These were some of the best memories as I was growing up, and was under 10 years old. :)

* I remember when I first moved out to Ventura County, new area, new school, new friends. I was used to moving, because we had moved a lot – from New York to California and back and forth. My new middle school was Los Cerritos and was known as the school with no windows. Kids in the neighborhood referred to it as a prison, because there was only one window on the front of the building in the art room. As I walked into the school office, ready for my mom to register me, I met my very first friend – Shoshana. She was sweet and helpful and offered to show me where my class was. She had just come back to school after a scoliosis surgery. Shoshana and I had some amazing times at that school. I met some more kids – JR, Denise & Scott and we all became friends. One of my favorite memories with my friends was when we planned a haunted house inside the school for the Halloween carnival we were having. We planned and set up an entire haunted tour of the school, which was awesome!

* The apartment that I lived in when I first moved to Ventura County, was The Knolls. I have some wonderful memories of that place. Babysitting, helping with the events the apartment community had for the kids, searching for treasures in trash cans with Danny, selling handmade bouquets of flowers and wreaths, and holding kid Olympic events outside my apartment. I recall the first day that I saw my paperboy. He was soooo cute, and rollerbladed all over the complex. His name was John, and he was my first real big crush. I had some great times with John over the years, and we were friends all through high school and even talk a little now.

* I’ve had a lot of jobs in different fields, but I can honestly say that the one that brought me the most happiness was when I worked my first real office job at a local limousine company. I remember waking up every morning looking forward to seeing my fellow staff, my drivers and those gorgeous long stretches. It really was a highlight working there, and brought me so much joy and education. That wasn’t the only job that I loved. The next job that followed that one, was working at Curves – the women’s gym. I met and inspired many women, and still run into them now – over 5 years later. I ended up managing 3 Curves over the years and loved every minute of it.