The Journey of Change

After a cancer diagnosis, we feel like we've lost our identity, at least I felt that way the first day - when I was diagnosed with Leukemia. I didn't think to myself, what happens next? I didn't wonder how my life was about to change, instead I went with the flow, did what I had to do to survive and beat the cancer! Now, 2 years later and cancer free, I still think about my experience and how it has changed my life. I cannot go back to the way it was - my perfect immune system and the fact that I rarely ever got sick, my amazing job, the friends I knew, my awesome and unbelievable amounts of energy, the path I was on had disappeared and in it's place - a new path was being built. The more years that pass me by, the more and more I realize that my life is new, this road in front of me doesn't look at all how I had imagined it would be, and the stepping stones on my path through life have all changed. No more dreams of being a teacher, no more beading and clay times and business dreams with Shoshie, no more pretty green Toyota Camry with the sunroof screwed on, no more careless dating, no more adventures with bad boy types, no more adventures living in the Antelope Valley.

The fact was, that my priorities had changed in a HUGE way, my goals and passions had shifted, and the once clear, but broken path that I was traveling on had become a colorful bridge of amazing options and chances. Things started happening in my life, and chances became more and more clear and apparent to me. Before all this, I had been the introvert, the girl who stayed with her little circle of friends, and who would have conflicts with everyone else, I wasn't an A+ student, instead I was more of a C, C- student, I was terrified to speak in public and would rather take the F on a project than have to subject myself to speaking in front of the class, I had lots of dreams and desires of where I wanted to go in my life, but as I have said before - I lacked the focus to stay on track...... That was me then. And I had turned into this passionate young woman with big goals and dreams of inspiring others to fight cancer, to spread hope to all I had met, to speak out and share my journey and my battle against cancer with others who had never experienced it and who may never experience it in their lifetime. I became this woman that I never imagined I would be - the woman who would fight for a cause, for a dream and wouldn't stop for any reason. I am passionate about spreading the word, about sharing my journey, about creating an organization that connects cancer survivors with fellow survivors and their families and friends, an organization that fights to make one another strong, to spread Hope, Passion, Inspiration, and Love to those who need it to stay strong. With this journey, and the start of my public speaking, it was all brought to me through my journey with cancer. It was meant to be, and I wouldn't change it for the world.

The truth is, I have changed as a person as a whole. I stopped dating just to date and realized that I needed a man as strong willed and passionate as myself - someone intelligent, funny, with a passion for life and love, with a passion to help others, with goals and drive to do the things that make him happiest. I was done looking for the bad boy types that lacked dreams and inspiration, and I was on to some cool and fabulous adventures with some awesome geeky guys. I have had some time to think about what I want to do with my organization, and what drives me....... Having had cancer, the experience itself drives me to do amazing things. I just won't stop......
Change is scary, it brings NEW possibilities, it brings different ideas and suggestions, it brings eye opening visions and sights, it brings so much and at times it's hard to even fathom everything, every option, every alternative. But this is my journey, and I will enjoy every moment as it comes. Whether it be in dating, in life, at the City of Hope, at Cancer Survivor events, at UCAAN events, in the supermarket, anywhere and everywhere I travel..... I will take in the experience and share what I have learned. This is a Journey Worth Living! And Gosh darn it, I'm Loving Every Minute of IT!!!!! The question is, are you?